Crazy About You
By Brangien
“Life is full of uncertainties and unpredictability. You can’t tell whether things will still be the same as they are a minute ago. There are a lot of crazy things left unspoken and are waiting to be discovered. The only truth in this world is that--you cannot expect of something to go on as normal forever. The wheel is keep on turning and the clock won’t stop from running. Crazy things are meant to happen… the essence of fooling around and the least of all reason that you learned how to love. Crazy believing that love conquers all… will fate be playing with me too?”
Prologue
The last day of those many days will be today. And I don’t like it… unquestionably. After this, what will happen to us… where will it leave us? Are we going to be friends after all the craziness we’ve been through? I don’t like to expect anymore… you need to take on the wheels by yourself and figure out if you are staying or not… or whatever will happen after that, I don’t care anymore. There is just one thing I would like to be concerned about--and that would be… am I able to put myself inside your heart this time?
“You don’t like my place?” the voice sounded very intimidated. Liam asked as he walks by the fireplace holding a bottle of my favorite Cabernet Sauvignon.
“No… I’m just amazed. You live here alone?” I still have a lot of questions.
“Why? Do you see anyone else?” he replied as if I saw someone else. Liam doesn’t really know how to crack a joke. But he looks so weird tonight. He is cunningly look childish or rather acts like a child… it is very obvious from the way he speaks and how he moves around.
“Hahaha… don’t try to make yourself funny. Why did you bring me here?” seems that I don’t know what I am talking about.
But actually, right now, I am clueless of what to do. I’ve been waiting for this… for this guy to bring me at his place and show a part of his life that I really wanted to see. Now that I am here… it is so odd that all of my curiosity about his life were gone. I am plainly so nervous.
“Say something… you look weird today… what’s wrong?” he ended his words with that smile.
“Nothing… I am just thinking of something.” I replied. Yet the truth is, there is really nothing going on my mind now. I feel floating… and very weightless. “I just feel a little edgy.” I dropped a hint but still so lame.
“Come on, wouldn’t you like to be here?” he keeps on asking. “You’ve been giving me hints all this time that you wanted to be here… don’t tell me I got it so wrong?” he then followed.
I don’t know what to say. Or maybe I have just decided to keep silent and enjoy this moment with him. I don’t want tomorrow to come anymore. I would like to stay here forever… and I want to see myself in this scene with him… just like this… as long as possible.
“This is what you’ve been asking right… you wanted this for so long…” he is certain about it.
Spot on… the 100th day and the 100th task arrived without warning. I really thought we were just going to such a place where he will then break my heart. But this is too much. I feel drowning from all the swirling and whirling of my feelings and the suddenly changes of my heartbeat and my body temperature. Liam and I… just us… in his flat… and I cannot think of any better thing than this. I want to enjoy this night the way he wanted me to enjoy it. The thing is, I am not so sure about what he plans to do after. Will it be a happy ending for the both of us or it’ll just be a hilarious finale for him to enjoy.
The fear of losing him by tomorrow morning lingers in my head. Right now, I wanted to stop the clock from running and consume the rest of our time until every second is gone. I wish to extend this fantasy and make more dreams if I am dreaming… I hope not to wake anymore. But this is really happening and I am not dreaming. I am at the real world and not in my own imaginary land. I am sure that this moment will pass so fast and I can’t stop the time from running and there is no chance of going back to this time again. Because in the real world… there is no such thing as “magic.” And love on the real world sometimes gets so messy that even those who fall so truly might be feeling they just slipped on a sloppy slope.
Liam noticed that my silence brought me to my own world, so he deals putting on the fire instead. After lighting up the fireplace, he uncorked the bottle of red wine and poured a starter to two tall red wine glasses. He is not a wine drinker actually. Liam prefers beer like every other guy in his team and maybe like all other normal guys out there. I was the one who forced him to appreciate the goodness of it, and now, I don’t really have to push him every time I decided to unwind.
He suddenly waved the smile that I like. I am pretty sure he knows that I like it I never saw him showing it to anyone else… and I am sure that this guy made it just for me… his personalized smile for me that struck me each and every time.
It was a total eclipse… and very silent. What I could only hear is the hushing of the leaves outside and the throbbing of my heart. It is very dark outside and all that illuminates my vision is the fire from the fireplace that is just starting to grow. What is happening? Has he decided to keep his thought to his self and give me a quiet time? Why doesn’t he fool around like what he has been doing all this time? I finished my wine so fast that got his attention, or rather, there is nothing going on really… and that is the only thing worh noticing about.
“You have other plans for tonight?” He asked while pouring my second glass of my favorite brand. He sounded like I was planning of going somewhere else.
“I’m sorry. Never noticed that I drunk too fast.” I replied.
“I think I poured too little for your starter. I forgot that it was Château Renaissance.” He focuses on pouring on the wine and being too careful not to waste a drip at the end. Is it really possible for him to forget about this very specific detail about me or he is just making an excuse to make a conversation?
I am such a fool. I don’t know what to do. If I stay quiet until we finish the bottle… what shall I do next? Why hasn’t this guy say anything rather questioning me about this nonsense-ness? He is so hard to read right now. The impulse he is giving right now doesn’t match the movements of his eyes and connects to the smiles he continuously throws whenever our eyes met. It is so obvious to me that I don’t like to do anything… it is so clear to me that once I’ve started a “conversation”, everything will move in a fast-forward.
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