Happiness...

As the years passes by... once I came on thinking that why do my life seems to be connected to so many people? Why can't I live as I wanted? Why can't I make myself happy for the fact that I do make people around me happy?
And answers came tolling...
"What is my purpose in life?" That was the answer i received.
But I guess I am too hard to myself for fulfilling such a purpose. I am still a person... and I need to love myself. Yet, when I am ready to give up on this, there will be an instance that will change my mind. Then I will go back to fulfill again my duties. So when will I have time to make myself happy? Or do I have to???
One day while I'm walking my way to work, I came across a bookshop... and I paid a visit. While looking around I found a book... "Things That Makes You Happy". And I see myself reading on a page. "What is your purpose in life?" as I read... laugh came after. Don't tell me that all my thoughts are in this book. If this book will just only suggest to know my purpose... well it is nonsense to continue reading. So I skipped so many pages. "If you think that your purpose is to make people happy, then you cannot make your own self happy." And I asked myself why?
Just like the sun who gives us heat and light. The sun is so powerful but it cannot benefit from itself and thus, as time flies, it dies because of its purpose. It seems that it is too hot and too bright when getting closer to the sun, so why does it not get hot nor blinded by itself. It does but the sun persist because it knows that so many depends on it.
Those people who are the source of ones happiness will not be able to drive some happiness back to themselves. There might be nothing you can do to make yourself happy... and I mean it. You don't have to make yourself happy.
Thus... as I read more the book I am holding. It tells me... "if you can't make yourself happy... then find someone whose purpose is to make you happy."